It's over, i guess.

I guess you wouldn't need me to be here anymore. My world crumbles on the thoughts of you and I being apart. & It's over for me.

Problems, Troubles & Worries, had all been piling up too high, way too high up.
Accumulating to a point, on the verge of breaking down.
I need a breather, seriously. I'm tired, tire out physically & yet, mentally.
All these sleepless nights, I've been resting only when it's close to dawn every night. Maybe, I stayed awake awaiting, just hoping to receive a simple phone call/text message from you. But, none of them ever came by.
Maybe, just maybe,
This would be the last & final time that I'll be posting about you, J.
Every single matter happening in my current life is crushing me down, way too hard.
Things wasn't the same anymore after you've left me.
You've been part of the best memories I could have,
Starting from the day we get to know each other to, playing Impossible Quiz2 which got us closer, Halloween party at Bev's house,
the girl whose hands I first held at the Science Center.
Long phone calls, almost every single night.
How we struggled to continue this relationship. We did struggled through your mum's objections, maybe only for a moment. But, at least it is some beautiful moments together.
Best moments in life with you, etched deep into my heart.
On this upcoming Wed, March26. We had been apart for two months.
For nearly 2 months, we had struggled with the absence of love.
Learning how to get used to being alone.
Pictures of you, were framed in an unusual way. Indescribable, unique you.
I missed the journey of sending you home without fail, except for once.
Though we lived miles away, But you just seems to be so near, so close by.
I missed the scent of you in my arms,
hugging you tightly every single time, so afraid of losing you.
I can't bring myself to allow all these beautiful memories from vanishing.
Awaken from dreams and reality came by.
Reality of us being apart, my world crumbles.
Yes, for both of us it would be tough to adapt to such loss. It would be tough and I'm trying to stay strong and be positive.
Because, I know my family still needs me at times like this.
Therefore, I had no choice but to slowly learn to accept the fact that you're moving away slowly, with each passing day.
Thanks for being part of my beautiful memories &
For every tingle of love you gave me, I won't ever forget.
In times to come, I'll only be a fading fragment of your memory.

Initially, I wanted to rant everything out to you.
But no, I didn't. I prefer to end it this way.
At first, I didn't really want you to see this post. I don't know why. Maybe, I just don't wish to let go off you yet. But, you're leaving me with no choice? I hate all these! Tell me when will you be back? Never? There's a guy so close to you, & where do I stand?
I dare not to think it. Let it past & go?
I will still be here if you ever need someone to talk to. Goodbye, once loved J.

-Kenny